Saturday 1 September 2012

A weird way to shoot for the moon

I got offered an amazing opportunity!!! "What opportunity is that?" I hear you ask.

If you are wondering how I hear that, it is because I have your home wire tapped. Ha ha not really. And if you're now thinking to return that pot plant with the hidden camera delivered to your doorstep, don't. No reason. Just don't.

So, back to your question that my pot plant camera picked up you saying out loud, my dream job is to write stories for a living ... And what is even better than that, having my stories interpreted in a graphic novel.

Now in the end, I turned down the opportunity to have my ideas translated into a graphic novels because... It wasn't quite right for me. But I responded to the job ad in a pretty crazy type of way - and it worked! So I thought I would share it below.

Note, I was going to send a video of me doing the application in interpretive dance, but this is what I decided to send instead:

Dear Canadian employer,

As you opened your email today, you sucked in the cold office air and no doubt put your hand to your forehead. Oh no! The ‘Hoard of Potential Candidates’! But as the metaphorical mist cleared, one stood out. The chosen one. A candidate half man, half graphic narrative angel – Daniel Grant Newton.

A self-published novelist magician with a plethora of ideas brewing, armed with sketching dynamite yearning for your guidance, and a sparkling dream in his pounding heart.

Born under the winking stars of Australia, captivating stories were emptied into his head by kangaroos who made little happy kangaroo tears.

“Could he be the one?” you ask.

If Odin’s rune stones are to be believed, then yes. But if you are not an Asgardian, then invite me to share my work and find out.

As my homing pigeons are unreliable, and my personal messenger was attacked by ninjas, it is best to contact me via telephone on XXXXXX, or by email on: XXXXXX@XXXXX.com

I look forward to talking with you.

Daniel

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